The Charter of Suscipe Domine

 

Good children all, attend this rhyme,
A tale of piety and time;
Of rules that guard the faithful band,
Who post in forums, stern yet grand.

Kaesekopf, the master here,
Commands with firmness, not with fear:
"One account each! Don’t play the clown,
And clergy—write me, mark it down."

No masks of proxy, VPN,
Shall veil the hearts of upright men.
And woe betide the vulgar tongue,
That soils the words where prayers are sung.

No troll shall toss his wicked bait,
No scandalmonger spread his hate.
Of pornography speak not here,
Nor blasphemies that chill the ear.

Trad-bashing, too, is most unwise,
And gossip is the Devil’s prize;
So if you’ve aught against a friend,
A private message may amend.

When posting news, cite where you’ve read,
Provide your thoughts (not links instead).
For speech in English is the way—
Unless you climb "The Alps" to stray.

Now sedevacantists may speak,
But name the Pope with tone oblique;
No silly names, no childish jests,
Respect is due, even to pests.

Non-Catholics too may come and see,
Provided they speak charitably;
But error has no rights, my son,
So sway the faithful?—That’s not done.

The moderators, clothed in green,
Rule calmly in their font serene;
And if you cross their firm decree,
You’ll find no friend in charity.

So sign your name, observe the line,
Be Catholic, courteous, and benign;
For forums fall when rules are bent,
But stand when tempered by consent.